FAQ

Frequently Asked Questions

About Triggers

Below you will find the answers to the most frequently asked questions about the phenomenon of triggers. We answer why you react the way you do, why someone triggers you, and how you change this automatism into a conscious choice.

I feel like I lose control in a split second.

I need a way to hit the brakes in the moment.

It feels like the topic changes, but the fight is always identical.

When my partner is already triggered...

I.e. catastrophic forecasting, resorting to threats, kitchen sinking, resort to a personal attack, giving the silent treatment or using generalized labeling.

What is the Amygdala Hijack?

The Amygdala Hijack is a common term for when your emotions completely take over your rational mind. Think of it as your brain’s emotional alarm system (the amygdala) hitting the panic button before your logical brain has a chance to assess the situation.

It leads to an intense, immediate, and often exaggerated reaction, like shouting, freezing, or fleeing, that you might regret minutes later. It’s an ancient survival mechanism kicking in at the wrong time.

Where does the name come from?

The term was popularized by psychologist Daniel Goleman in his book, Emotional Intelligence. It’s named after a part of your brain called the amygdala , which is a small, almond-shaped region responsible for processing strong emotions, especially fear and stress.

When it "hijacks" your brain, it temporarily shuts down the prefrontal cortex, which is the part of your brain responsible for calm, reasoned thinking and planning.

What does an Amygdala Hijack feel like?

It can feel different for everyone, but common signs include:

  • Sudden Overwhelm: Going from zero to intense anger, panic, or despair in a split second.
  • Loss of Control: Saying or doing things impulsively without thinking of the consequences.
  • Physical Symptoms: A racing heart, shallow breathing, tense muscles, or a feeling of being frozen or paralyzed.
  • Tunnel Vision: Focusing only on the perceived threat or trigger and being unable to see any other perspective.

Is this an anxiety disorder?

No. The Amygdala Hijack itself is not a disorder; it is a normal, hardwired biological function. Every human brain is capable of it.
However, if you experience them frequently or intensely, it can be a sign of high chronic stress, unresolved trauma, or an underlying anxiety condition. In those cases, the amygdala is more easily triggered, requiring less of a perceived threat to initiate a "hijack."

For more information go to the page Triggers.

How can I prevent Amygdala Hijacks from happening as much as possible ?